I don't know what MLB was thinking with these Players' Weekend uniforms. All white vs. all black? Really! The NCAA has an (often broken) rule about the number being the same color as the uniform, and it's easy to see why. Because you can't see the home team's numbers! I can't even see them on TV. I can only imagine how bad it is for fans in the upper deck! And the white hats? It makes the players look like they're either the members of a paint crew or a Broadway stage crew!
Anyway, we'll only have to deal with looking at these monstrosities for just a weekend. I really feel for the fans of teams who wear horrible uniforms all the time. Some of those teams realized their mistake right away and went back to more traditional logos/uniforms as soon as they were able to. While others subject their fans to bad uniform after bad uniform.
But what are the all-time worst? I'm not talking about the ones that were so ugly that they were actually somewhat endearing like the Astros' tequila sunrise uniforms of the 70s and 80s. I'm talking the ones that were straight-up bad! Like these...
Jacksonville Jaguars (2013-17): Ah, yes, those infamous two-tone helmets. I think my feelings on those were pretty well-known during the five years Jacksonville wore them. A high-school team uniform for a team that, except for that one AFC Championship Game appearance, mostly looked like a high school team while they were wearing them. My question is: Who actually thought these helmets were a good idea?! There wasn't anybody in the focus group who told them how ridiculous they looked?
Denver Broncos (1960-61): General rule of thumb, unless you're the San Diego Padres (who should bring the combo back), brown and yellow simply doesn't work! But that didn't stop the Broncos during their first two years. The vertically-striped socks obviously made the uniforms. Uniforms which were so ugly that the team literally burned them prior to the 1962 season, when they went to their now-familiar blue and orange. But they did return as throwbacks for the AFL's 50th anniversary a few years ago!
Vancouver Canucks (1978-85): Speaking of brown & gold, the Vancouver Canucks had that market cornered on the hockey front! They went through several incarnations of brown & gold uniforms (sidebar: the uniform exhibit is one of the coolest things in the Hockey Hall of Fame), but the "Flying V" version was definitely the worst. And they had two of them! One was brown with a yellow V, the other was yellow with a brown V. Both were remarkably bad.
Buffalo Sabres (2006-10): While I was going to school in Buffalo, the Sabres had a black, red and silver buffalo-head logo that I'll always associate with them. As soon as I left, they switched back to their original blue & gold colors with the much-reviled "buffaslug" logo that didn't endear itself to anyone (and bears an uncanny resemblance to a certain President's hair). When they hosted the inaugural Winter Classic on New Year's Day 2008, they wore throwbacks to their original uniform, which was back as their regular uniform not too soon after that.
New York Islanders (1995-97): You saw these coming, didn't you? Possibly the worst (and most ill-advised) jersey change in NHL history! The Islanders took their perfectly functional Long Island silhouette logo and replaced it with this, complete with the waves (which I guess were supposed to be coming off Long Island Sound) on the bottom, prompting plenty of "Fish Sticks" chants from Rangers fans. They figured out pretty early that these were a mistake and the old logo was back within two years (which is probably the minimum allowed time).
Los Angeles Rams (2017): Talk about ill-advised changes. When the Rams moved back to LA, owner Stan Kroenke decided he wanted to change the team's identity, so he decided to go back to their blue-and-white color scheme from the early 70s. Except he didn't want to wait until the new stadium opens next year, so they had the new helmets with white horns and the old St. Louis Rams uniforms that are accented in gold. Resulting in this ridiculous mismatched look. At least the team and the NFL realized how dumb it looked and the Rams started wearing their throwback blues. Really, they should just ditch the white horns and wear the throwbacks permanently. That's the LA Rams, not the white!
Arizona Diamondbacks (2016-Present): Where do I start with the Diamondbacks' current uniforms? How about the weird dark gray color? Or that snakeskin pattern going down the side? Or the number that's randomly teal (which isn't anywhere in their color palate)? The home uniforms are just as bad (and they come with a two-tone hat that's similar to that terrible Jaguars helmet).
Miami Marlins (2019-Present): For a team that's only been around 25 years, the Marlins sure have a long uniform history. This year's vintage is their fourth different set of primary uniforms. Three of the four options aren't horrible (I actually really like the teal one), and in many ways they're better than the previous version. But the black-on-black is simply awful. It's unreadable! C'mon Derek, you're better than this!
Philadelphia 76ers (1991-94): Like the Chicago White Sox, the Philadelphia 76ers have made some questionable uniform choices throughout their history. But these are by far the worst! (Were the uniforms the reason Charles Barkley demanded a trade after the 1991-92 season?) Anyway, the shooting stars up the side scream "early 90s," like so many of the other bad NBA uniforms from that era.
Cleveland Cavaliers (1994-99): These uniforms, meanwhile, scream "mid 90s!" Teams across all sports were obsessed with teal at the time, and the Cavs took it to the extreme. It's like someone took a can of teal paint and spilled it all over the black uniform. It didn't work! Just imagine if LeBron had been subjected to these like Shawn Kemp was. Not surprisingly, they never wore them as throwbacks during his eight years in Cleveland.
Are there plenty of other terrible uniforms throughout the history of the four major sports? Of course! And I haven't even touched the WNBA or MLS! Then there's the NFL Color Rush, which is the complete opposite of what MLB is doing with this whole black & white thing for Player's Weekend. Also, you've got the Yankees playing the Dodgers, with neither team wearing their classic uniforms. For shame!
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